Matthew Gruman

Tom Waits - “I Never Talk to Strangers” (with Bette Midler)

Why I love my job #7845301874

Before I do any sort of design work for authors, I like to read as many of their books as possible. I’ve got nine children’s books to bring home this weekend.

If someone had told the child me that I’d be doing this sort of thing as a job, I would have pretended to pay attention until it was socially acceptable to start reading again.

• Travis: just put in for my time off
• dec 11 is my last day of the year
• Matthew: awesomepossum.com!
• that's gonna be my new thing
• pronounced "awesome possum dot com"
• Travis: this has been fun, but i wont be talking to you again

“Is it bad that when I see you in my head you have a mustache?

— Natalie

blownspeakers:

circumpolarnavigation:

aaronleaf:

Much of downtown Toronto came to a standstill for hours this morning as Toronto Police, animal services and an emergency task force surrounded and Tasered a wayward deer that ran through the financial district.

After running past office towers and Union Station, the deer eventually took refuge on a grassy patch on the east side of a medical office building at the corner of Chestnut and Edward streets. Around 11 a.m., ETF officers moved their trucks closer to the animal, in an apparent attempt to create a barrier in which to contain it.

They shot the deer with a tranquilizer dart, prompting it to run north, where police were holding a large net. The deer then veered and launched majestically over a strip of yellow police tape.

An officer then jolted the deer with a Taser; it immediately crumpled on the sidewalk.

Deer dashing through downtown Toronto Tasered - Posted Toronto

First of all, how did a deer manage to find it’s way to downtown Toronto? And why the fuck would they taser it? The tranquilizer dart wasn’t good enough?

If she didn’t want to get tasered, she should get a fucking job and get off the fucking street and stop resisting goddamn arrest.

Oh sorry, this was in TO. I thought it was the VPD for a second there.

lol

∞ matt did a poo

Who says SEO doesn’t matter anymore?

It's not a "good" story, but it's a story

• Travis: how are you feeling?
• Matthew: better
• but ugh... you know when you're sick and get better, you'll sometimes get night sweats?
• i got bus sweats this morning
• it was so awful
• Travis: OMG!
• Matthew: 30 minutes of horror, but then i stepped off and felt awesome
• Travis: that sounds terrible
• Matthew: yeah
• and to top it all off, i finally decided to dress appropriately for the weather and wore a warm coat
• so i'm standing on the back of the b-line, shvitzing my ass off and looking like i'm dying
• at one point, i get that awful "single bead of sweat slowly running down back" feeling
• finally grab a seat, tear off the jacket, and accidentally smack the girl next to me REALLY hard in the process
• so, so bad
• Travis: awkwardness = 3
• matthew's pride = -3
• Matthew: hahaha

sillygwailo:

Free ideas for Tumblr blogs:

cutiesinrubberboots.tumblr.com and related to that, japanesegirlsinvancouverwearingshortskirtsandfluffybootsinwinter.tumblr.com djshelpingthelistenerbypointingoutwhenthebeatdrops.tumblr.com

I would follow two of those. Get on it, people.